Sunday, 2 September 2012

Healthy dose of judgement guilt.


I like to think of myself as pretty easy going, I try not to judge people, I don't know their situations and they don't know mine. Who am I to butt in with my opinions? No one, that's who. This week I got a healthy dose of a reminder that you should never judge a book my its cover. Or a person with his bum hanging out.

I was sitting outside Starbucks, relaxing with Mojo and Mr M. Sipping my refresher (cool lime) yummy. I looked over in to the high street. There is a man in an electric wheelchair (lets call him Mark) , he was cruising down the path. Suddenly he stopped, just like that. A man (we'll call him Bob for the remainder) , dressed in joggers with his arse hanging out stood in front of him, with his mate next to him. His hood was pulled up over his peak cap, and he had chains hanging from his neck like tinsel. He had huge rings on his fingers, and a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. You get the picture right? Right.

I was convinced something bad was about to happen. Bob stuffed his hands in his pockets and walked around to the back of the wheelchair and removed the bags.

You know that moment when you see something, you get a flash of 'what should I do?' That is how I felt, I had that pang in my chest that I may be sitting by when something bad is happening.

Bob handed the bags to his friend, he reached his arm into the pockets of the man in the wheelchair.

I was getting a bit jittery. Could I recognise them if this really was a bad thing happening? Could I? 

Bob then unbuckled the clasp securing Mark into the chair and swiftly lifted him, placed him back down and removed keys and a wallet.

Fuck. I had sat and watched this happen. I had sat by and watched that happen and done nothing, I was livid with myself.

Bob then moved to the side of Mark and rearranged him, gentle re-tucked all his fleece padding, bent down and tenderly re-did the laces that had fallen open. He placed his arms round Mark and gave him a massive kiss. Fixed his pillow. He took a small comb out of his back pocket, the one which was sagging below his arse. Took it through Marks hair. They were laughing and joking.

Mark got his wheelchair on the move again, Bob and his mate walked along side him. They were talking away, I caught just enough of the conversation to hear Mark say -

 'Thanks for coming to help, I was getting really uncomfortable'

And the reply

'You know I've always got your back'.

I judged, I shouldn't have. I feel very humbled and stupid about it, even today. So I should.

Have you ever had a moment in your life where you have misjudged someone so badly? I would love to hear it.


13 comments:

  1. I would have felt the same as you! So true you can't judge a book by its cover and actually a really lovely story.

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    1. In the end it was so lovely to see, I still can't believe I did it. Thanks for the comment :)

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  2. Very cool post. So difficult to get it right, isn't it

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    1. It really is. Thanks for the comment. x

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  3. Ever had a moment like that? I think I probably do it daily, without even realising it. Thanks for the reminder :)

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    1. Ah, I think deep down we all do it. Even though we like to think we don't. Thanks for the comment x

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  4. I think I judge far too much, even though I try hard not to. A lovely story though, I think sometimes we really do have to stop and think rather than jump to conclusions x

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    1. I jumped to that conclusion so fast. I'm still ashamed about it. Argh. Thanks for the comment. x

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  5. Hi I just popped over from twitter(@janglitz) and I loved this post because its soooo true-jumping to conclusions is risky-Here's my short story - after visiting mu hubbys friend & wife and other members of their family-some of whom i hadn't met before.... upon leaving...I said to one lady oooh when are you due-looking down at her huge bump...."oooh nooo she said"that's just my belly.....I felt so embarrassed "ooooh sorry....I said sheepishly, I couldn't get out the door quick enough..

    http://janglitzbbeautiful.blogspot.co.uk/

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    1. Thanks for stopping by! It really is a foot in mouth situation isn't it? Thanks for commenting. x

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  6. I think it's quite brave to admit it! We all get it wrong from time to time-good to hear that apppearances are decieving in a good way. We don't always hear these stories enough x

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    1. I agree, it was one I had to share. Still feel like a fool about it! x

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  7. not me, but my family. When I met my other half, I was 16 he was a 25 year old, biker looking, long haired, skinny and scruffy....man. They were horrified and would have done anything to split us up. They got to know him.
    He's now my 48yr old, still kinda biker looking, bald, spreading slighly and very smart.....husband of over 20yrs and father to my beautiful boys! Everyone has to have one lesson in life on not judging lol x

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