Thursday, 10 January 2013

Manners & Me.


I'm not a stickler for manners, I just really (REALLY) like them. I get all red and flustered if Eldest forgets her 'Please' or 'Thank-you'. But I can't stop there, I can't - my brain won't let me.

  • Crossing on the stairs, be polite and blumin wait
  • Eating before everyone is at the table 
  • Taking the first piece of cake for yourself
  • Washing your hands before eating
  • Having to ask twice 'Who is calling please?' - I really hate that one.
  • Letters from people you've never met that start 'Dear Lorna/Betty/Louise' - If we haven't met previously, my name is Mrs. Mojo, thank you very much.

I have however noticed a new thing lately, I am not sure how or why I noticed it but I really do it.

These have all been said while angry.

  1. Eat your dinner please!
  2. Mind your business, thank you very much!
  3. I will have less of that back chat thanks!
  4. Mr. M - will you please fuck off.
  5. Eldest - WILL YOU PLEASE BE QUIET.
  Now, I would love to know why it is that during a time where the very bones of me a rattling with anger (points 1,4 and 5) I still manage to fit in a polite bit. I find this really odd because lately I am meeting more and more children in varying ages who apparently don't know what a 'please' or a 'thank you' are. There is nothing at all more satisfying sometimes than getting a 'thank-you'. You get a little glow of pride for doing something that was worth being thanked for.
So why the fark do some children seem to not have or use the simplest most effective way to show gratitude. It is easy enough to blame the parents, but the chances are just like me and thee, these parents have also sat for hours going -

'And what do we saaaaaay Ermintrude? P..P..Puuuhhh...Puullll, Puuurrrrlllleeeeee'
'PERLICE' - Confused smile from confused child.

'No we say Puuuurrrlleeeeaassseeeeeeee,' by this time we are over parenting. Over enunciating every word, and playing the brilliant parent role to absolutely no one, because no one is there you fucking muppet. 

If you'd like to see my example of 'Thhhhh (while spit is leaping off a desperate parental tongue, you'll have to wait till I feeling a bit more ranty.)

The children of these/we/me/you/us/united parents just choose to forget sometimes, they choose to drop the glorious 'Thank-You' or 'Please' for no reason that I can fathom.

I say we rise up!! RISE UP!!! And fight for these simple words. We might not be able to give our children giant bank accounts, huge houses, safety and comfort for their whole lives.

 But what we can give them, what we can instill in our beautiful children is that a 'Please' or a 'Thank-You', will cost nothing to say and it might just change someones day. Also just bloody do it.




Let me just do something nice here for you dear reader. It doesn't happen often. I'm gonna do it anyway....


Almost a Year!


Not my blog, it's not my blog birthday, that was last year sometime at the end of it. I'll never really know I don't think, because I started a blog a few years ago, a cool one cause I thought I was Carrie Bradshaw and that my life was interesting. Truth is, it wasn't.

So I deleted all those posts and photos and left it. Then, when I was pregnant a fat I started typing again. I think I got better as I went along. I'll never be a Bronte but then, they probably didn't drink gin while watching their youngest child wedge a pea up her nose. Probably.

So anyway, my blog did have a birthday but I forgot it. Like a long lost friend. I didn't give it blog cake, candles or a romantic dinner. I should have taken the time to do so. However, if you read a lot you'll know that the end of 2012 (from Sep) onwards was utter bullshit then a bit of good news in the bullshit. So! That brings me neatly around to my title.

Almost a year!

It has been almost a year since me and Mr M could snuggle on the couch all night drinking hot chocolate and getting a bit PG 13. Why? Because we've become the half way house. Firstly my Brother, that was expected and pre-arranged. Mother had been clear he was not welcome up North when the rest moved. That was fine. It was expected. He had a girlfriend. It is more than expected that she will stay over now and then. It's fine. They then found a flat. There was no point her leaving for a few days to come back again. A pet for the new flat. Yes. It is expected. When you're setting up a life you do need to get these things in order.

That is fine.

Zoom forward, they have been moved out a few weeks. Blissful weeks. This is not because I don't like them. This is because I like myself more. I like to relax however I choose to.

Vatti moved in - he is still here. Him and Mother are 'Talking' - Which disgusts me, it makes my nostrils flare a little bit in an indignant rage. I think perhaps I even snarl, like a small angry beast.

Currently I see no way of this changing, unless -

  • They get back together
  • He decided that he needs to move out
  • We decide he needs to move out

So almost a year of being the half way house. I think I may actually understand how it is to be a parent of an older teenager. I am pretty sure I get it.

I GET IT. 

This time coincides with the first year of Mojo's life. Which as all parents know, is quite spectacular at the worst of times. She walks, she talks, she tantrums and she is vile. I love her. Eldest has been working through what I can only describe as 'issues'. She is trying to understand life, and the family dynamic. She is far to gentle to understand or accept the truth about people, not even the truth about me. That is it though, isn't it sometimes I would rather be in another world than know what I know now.We learn every minute of everyday. Let me share what this year has taught me.

After almost a year I have learnt that -

  • An 'almost' year is my 'almost' limit. 
  • That, some family memebers and some families will give a lot to help others. 
  • That in return you may not get much more than a tea stain on the carpet and a deminished savings account.
  • I don't like poached eggs - this simple pleasure has vanishes
  • Another persons clothes might just about amount to ten peoples
  • Electricty does not grow on trees
  • It is cheaper to live in a tree
  • A Thank-you, on occasion may be forgotten. 
  • Sometimes 'Thank-you' is the only thing you need 
  • If you combine a 'Thank-you' with a nice tall Henricks, then you have a winner. 
  • I'm a winner. 
No matter what Sid treats me like a bastard all day everyday. I know exactly where I stand with him. Good Sid.

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